Market Morning: Cannabis On Sperm Count, JCPenney Appliance Axe, Dems Like Beer Tax Cuts

0
Market Morning:  Cannabis On Sperm Count, JCPenney Appliance Axe, Dems Like Beer Tax Cuts

Smoking Pot Maybe Makes More Sperm, Babies, Says Fertility Study of 662 Men

Having trouble conceiving? Relax, smoke a joint. It can’t hurt, and may actually help, says a new study of 1,143 semen samples from 662 men who attended a fertility clinic between 2000 and 2017. Those who admitted using marijuana turned out to have higher sperm counts than those who said they never did.  “These unexpected findings highlight how little we know about the reproductive health effects of marijuana, and in fact of the health effects of marijuana in general,” said lead research Dr. Jorge Chavarro of Harvard, in a moment of humble honesty. He cautions however that the effect may not be causal, as it may have to do with testosterone levels being naturally higher in those with an inclination to smoke marijuana in the first place, which would in turn cause a higher sperm count because of the testosterone. In any case, what the study does show is that it probably won’t hurt your sperm count. But yellow 5 food coloring might. Pot stocks were unmoved by the finding, as of yet. (NYSEARCA:MJ)

SEE: Baristas Coffee Expands Distribution Chain For EnrichaRoast CBD Coffee

Need a Fridge? Go Somewhere Else, Says JCPenney

J.C. Penney (NYSE:JCP), down to its last $400M in market cap and trading like a Penney stock, will no longer sell major appliances at their stores. The decision comes as the retailer fights off rumors of imminent bankruptcy, insisting that they had an earnings beat in the third quarter so everything’s OK. The plan will help them reduce floor space so that they can reduce rent costs and save money, focusing on what they’re better at selling, like clothes and soft home furnishings. The good news is that the stock is 43% above lows at 92 cents. It’s on fire. Talk amongst yourselves. (98% below all time highs, but who’s counting?)

GM To IPO Self Driving Cruise Unit? Maybe

General Motors (NYSE:GM) released a hint in its annual report that its self-driving car unit Cruise may do an initial public offering sometime within the next 10 years. The hint comes as the board of GM has awarded Dan Ammann, CEO of the Cruise unit, a bunch of stock incentives contingent on either a takeover or an IPO, so it’s at least in the cards. Cruise has a market cap of about $14.6 billion despite not making any money and not having any product ready for launch any time soon. It wants to launch of robo-taxi service by the end of the year, which is quite ambitious. It employs 1,100 people, all working on getting you a self-driving car service.

Democrats Want to Lower Taxes on Beer, Wine, Permanently?

Well I’ll be. A top democratic senator actually likes something in the new Republican tax regime, which includes a reduction on excise taxes for beer and wine. Senator Ron Wyden who sits on the Senate Finance Committee, wants to make these tax cuts permanent or as permanent as permanent can be in a dysfunctional cacophonous representative republic. The tax cuts instituted by President Trump are set to expire by the end of the year, so in the event that Wyden fails in getting these beer and wine tax cuts canonized, stock up now. Fill your cellars and secret beer fridges, before J.C. Penney stops selling them. The tax cuts however, have not seemed to help Anheuser Busch InBev (NYSE:BUD), whose stock has been cut in half since June 2016. This tax cut’s for you.

Tesla Makes First Model 3 Deliveries to Europe

After waiting 3 years for their orders, some Europeans are finally enjoying the Tesla (NASDAQ:TSLA) Model 3 they’ve been so anxious to take for a spin. It wasn’t perfect, as some were told to pick up their cars after a cargo ship from California docked off Belgium, but the cars weren’t there. Oops. 14,000 cars are either there or on their way, mostly headed for Norway and Germany. Tesla cut an additional $1,100 off the Model 3 price tag due to expiring tax credits.